Snow White
by Evilstrawberry
Summary: Snow White, short and weird. A guy Snow white, Evilstrawberrys and Beavers...I don't understand either... Please Read & Review!


**Snow White**  
  
**A/N: I wrote this for an English project. We had to make a picture book of a Fairy tale that we rewrote. It works better as a picture book…. tell me what you think! Please read & Review.  
  
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**Disclaimer: I don't own the original story of Snow White or anything you can recognise…I don't know who does *sad face* but its not me…**

  
Once there was a woman who was pregnant. She was sitting on a window ledge window, sewing. Suddenly she pricked her finger, a drop of red blood fell out. The lady looked at it then looked out into the snowy courtyard and made a wish.  
  
"I wish for my child to have hair as...as back as ebony, lips as red a blood and skin as white as snow."  
  
A fairy heard this wish and thought it was a bit strange, so before granting it she went up to the woman.  
  
"Are you sure, my Lady, that you want you child to have those qualities? Are you quite sure?" She Asked  
  
"I am sure, my child will be the most beautiful in the land."  
  
"OK, my lady. But remember you did wish for it." And the fairy granted the wish and flew off.  
  
Soon, the child was born. There was a commotion for the lady was the queen and this child was a royal baby. When it as born the mother asked a servant holding it.  
  
"Does my baby have what I wished for? Hair as black as ebony, lips as red a blood and skin as white as snow?"  
  
"Umm...yes my lady, it does. You wished this on it? Why?" Asked the Servant, looking at the lady strangely.  
  
"What do you mean why. My daughter will be the fairest in the land!"  
  
"Yes, well that would be so if you had a daughter." The servant lowered the baby into the Queens arms and the queen looked for the first time on her...son.  
  
"What!? But...I...oh...well then, I'll be going." She packed up her bags and left that day. Because she had not named the boy and the king was too busy picking a new wife, his name became Snow White.  
  
In a couple of years the king remarried, Snow White was four. He married a beautiful but cruel woman who was obsessed with beauty. Every day she would ask her mirror that was the most beautiful person in the land and it would tell her she was.  
  
Every time she didn't believe it, so of course she ended up with eating disorders and had major plastic surgery, but the mirror, when asked the who was the most beautiful person in the land answered "I am afraid to say it, but not you My Lady."  
  
"What? Of course I am the most beautiful, name one who is more beautiful!" The mirror privately thought the Queen was ugly and that anyone would be more beautiful, it cast around in its mind for a name to tell the queen. Snow White happened to be walking past down in the courtyard. He was now about eighteen.  
  
"Snow White is more fair, I am afraid." This put the Queen into a frenzy, she ordered her Royal Beavers and Evilstrawberries to catch Snow White and take him into the forest and kill him. When they all got to the place where Snow White was to die he pleaded with them.  
  
"Please don't hurt me!! I never eat strawberries and beavers are my favorite animal." Finally the Beavers and Strawberries decided to let Snow White go if he would do three things for them. He agreed.  
  
First the beavers wanted all the spaghetti he ever found, the Evilstrawberries wanted to be called the 'ES's' and not thing else. Then came the third thing.  
  
"We what your first child!" They said. But suddenly Rumplestiltskin appeared.  
  
"You stole my line you ^%#&^@%$. Give it back you ^*$*^%$^*%# I hope you &^*&^ in &%*%^ you lazy *&%*&%*!!" They gave it back quickly and had to think up another want.  
  
"I know! Let us call you Sir. Fugglesworth all the time and you have to pretend it's your real name!" Snow White agreed, not seeing the damage it could do. The Beavers and The 'ES's' left.  
  
But Snow White was getting scared, he started seeing things and ran around screaming a bit till he came to a strange house, it was really big, Snow White walked up to the door and couldn't reach the handle.  
  
He spent hours trying to open it but he took to long and the Seen Giants cane home.  
  
"Oh, hello. Are you another runaway? We already have one. Her name is Green Grass."  
  
From behind the giants walked a girl with hair as purple as grapes (the purple ones) lips as yellow as the sun and skin as green as grass. She and the prince fell in love and lived with the Giants for the rest of their days Green Grass working in the Mines and Snow White keeping House.  
  
The Queen was admitted to hospital because she ate some poison apple. Everyone else will be conveniently forgotten. Except the Beavers and Evilstrawberries, the beavers got their spaghetti and the 'ES's' are still 'ES's' (which is bad grammar but they wanted it that way) and they all call Snow White Sir. Fugglesworth, which makes people look at them weird.  
  
Snow White lived happily ever after until his first children (twins, boy and girl) became teenagers then he and Grass Green practically had a melt down, when asked why they terrorized their parents Mud Brown and Toilet-water Blue said 'it was in the job description.' And that is the end.  
  
  
**A/N: I am sure you want to tell me what you think of this *hint hint*. It doesn't make sense and it has no proper story line but it's sort of funny. Hey, even if you didn't like it you could give me some constructive criticisms. Thank you for reading!!! Bye******


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